I finally have some answers regarding my health issues. Last month, the neurologist finally realized that it wasn't all migraine-related. Numbness, tingly feelings, warm sensations in my body, as well as swelling, my hands starting to hurt more, my feet feeling like lead in the morning (and sometimes shuffling when I walk) as well as my toes hurting at times- that is not migraine related. So after having my blood drawn for tests such as lupus, RA (rheumatoid arthritis) and an ANA test, I finally got some answers yesterday.
I did a nerve test first. Well, 2, in fact. Man those hurt! I had my hand hooked up to a machine, to test my carpel nerve. I was hoping that I had no nerve damage, but it might have explained why I sometimes can't feel 100% in the last 2 fingers of either hand. Everything looked good, a little tennis elbow in my left arm, and some wear and tear in my right (due to being right-handed).
So then the neurologist says, "It all looks good. I will see you back here in 3 months." So I said, "what about my lab results with the blood tests?" Then she looked at the results, and said, "Your results look good. No lupus, no RA, your ANA test came back negative." As she is looking over the results, I was already thinking I would need a second opinion- because I knew, just knew, something was there. Then she was flipping from page 2 to page 3, then back to page 2, and back again. I knew she had seen something. So she says, "They decided to do another ANA test, and it came back high. You need to see a rheumatologist." The ANA test was to determine if I have any inflammatory in my body. Really high is in the 600's. Mine was 330, which is still high. It could be nothing, or it could be something. I believe it is something, given the way I have seen my body change since February. My rheumatology appointment is in a few weeks, so I will have a little more answers even then.
Friday, June 6, 2014
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Only God Knows
*This was written almost 2 months ago*
About 3 weeks ago, I had some pain in my right leg. It was only painful when it touched other things. Then I had a localized spot of it, and got scared, thinking it was a blood clot. An ultrasound revealed that it was not a blood clot, and blood tests were done- which also revealed that I don't have a high risk of blood clots.
Almost a week passes, and I start getting an aura (known in the migraine world of seeing something in the eye). I had it happen for the first time in early January, so I kind of thought I knew what was coming next. See, when it happened in January, I could see things, but they were out of focus in the center, more in focus out of center. This happened first, and then I got a headache. So I started pushing through it.
However, that Thursday was different than in January. I did end up getting a headache, but my left hand went numb, I slurred my words, and I had trouble comprehending things. I didn't register too much concern, because I was not in a clear mind. The symptoms subsided, all but the headache and the nausea that went with it. I ended up leaving school and calling my Doctor's office. They suggested I go to the E.R. Again, I didn't think much of it, and went home. Not to the E.R. C came home for lunch, and when I began telling him my symptoms, he began to get worried. Moreso after I shared about the slurred speech, numbness in my hand, and having trouble comprehending things. I will never forget how his eyes almost popped out of his head. With his urging, I went to the E.R. There, they did an MRI, and determined it was not a stroke, just an awful migraine. They sent me straight to a neurologist. She was concerned that it was Bell's palsy, or a mini stroke, because the right side of my face looked different than the left side of my face.
The next day, things were alright. I had a burning sensation in my head all day, and every so often, I felt a little numbness in my left hand. That evening, my entire left hand did go numb. So I went back to the E.R. During the few minutes it took to get to the E.R., I was praying, shaking my hand, trying to make it stop. I knew even then that if it was a stroke, I couldn't stop it. I was crying, hyperventilating, expecting the worst. I expected to have other parts of my body go numb, or expected to feel something stroke-related. Thankfully, I did not have a stroke. They ruled it as a complex migraine in the E.R., which can cause parts of the body to have temporary paralysis or numbness. They sent me home with a medication to take if it happens again, and to follow up with my neurologist asap.
I had some of the same symptoms that weekend, just not to the extent of Thursday and Friday. I followed up with the neurologist Monday, and eventually got an appointment to see her that Thursday. I saw her, and she said things were looking better with my face. Off and on (and still to this point) the right side looks different than the left- but I think it looks puffy. I have it even today. She said my test results she ordered for me came back good. She ordered a predictor test for strokes, for blood clots, etc. My sister (twin) has a blood clotting disease from a gene mutation sequence. I only have a part of it, and not the full mutation. So, no blood clots for sure. Which means that I don't have a huge chance of having a stroke. Unfortunately, for my sister, she does. And that worries me for her. I pray that she never has one.
By that Thursday, I had some slight swelling in my left hand. Still numbness in my left hand, but it was not a lot. In fact, it comes and it goes. She ordered an MRI/MRA (to check the blood vessels in my brain), which I just had done this Wednesday. I did have an echo cardiogram done last Wednesday, but no results on that yet.
Last Saturday, fingers in my right hand went numb. I cried. I was home by myself, and terrified something was going to happen. I cried because I was scared, not knowing what was going on in my body. My sister (she is a nurse, by the way) told me in a way it is good that my right side went numb, because it definitely rules out a stroke. All I can think of is, what is happening to my body?
So I dealt with some slight numbness in my right hand and arm this week. On Friday, my right calf started tingling, and it stayed that way for 3.5 hours. I am keeping a symptom/pain diary, so I wrote it down. Yesterday morning, I woke up with major swelling in my hands and arms. Then, I had some numbness in my right calf. Today, light numbness in my left hand, but still lots of swelling.
I am completely scared. I don't want to be alone. I don't understand what is going on in my body.
About 3 weeks ago, I had some pain in my right leg. It was only painful when it touched other things. Then I had a localized spot of it, and got scared, thinking it was a blood clot. An ultrasound revealed that it was not a blood clot, and blood tests were done- which also revealed that I don't have a high risk of blood clots.
Almost a week passes, and I start getting an aura (known in the migraine world of seeing something in the eye). I had it happen for the first time in early January, so I kind of thought I knew what was coming next. See, when it happened in January, I could see things, but they were out of focus in the center, more in focus out of center. This happened first, and then I got a headache. So I started pushing through it.
However, that Thursday was different than in January. I did end up getting a headache, but my left hand went numb, I slurred my words, and I had trouble comprehending things. I didn't register too much concern, because I was not in a clear mind. The symptoms subsided, all but the headache and the nausea that went with it. I ended up leaving school and calling my Doctor's office. They suggested I go to the E.R. Again, I didn't think much of it, and went home. Not to the E.R. C came home for lunch, and when I began telling him my symptoms, he began to get worried. Moreso after I shared about the slurred speech, numbness in my hand, and having trouble comprehending things. I will never forget how his eyes almost popped out of his head. With his urging, I went to the E.R. There, they did an MRI, and determined it was not a stroke, just an awful migraine. They sent me straight to a neurologist. She was concerned that it was Bell's palsy, or a mini stroke, because the right side of my face looked different than the left side of my face.
The next day, things were alright. I had a burning sensation in my head all day, and every so often, I felt a little numbness in my left hand. That evening, my entire left hand did go numb. So I went back to the E.R. During the few minutes it took to get to the E.R., I was praying, shaking my hand, trying to make it stop. I knew even then that if it was a stroke, I couldn't stop it. I was crying, hyperventilating, expecting the worst. I expected to have other parts of my body go numb, or expected to feel something stroke-related. Thankfully, I did not have a stroke. They ruled it as a complex migraine in the E.R., which can cause parts of the body to have temporary paralysis or numbness. They sent me home with a medication to take if it happens again, and to follow up with my neurologist asap.
I had some of the same symptoms that weekend, just not to the extent of Thursday and Friday. I followed up with the neurologist Monday, and eventually got an appointment to see her that Thursday. I saw her, and she said things were looking better with my face. Off and on (and still to this point) the right side looks different than the left- but I think it looks puffy. I have it even today. She said my test results she ordered for me came back good. She ordered a predictor test for strokes, for blood clots, etc. My sister (twin) has a blood clotting disease from a gene mutation sequence. I only have a part of it, and not the full mutation. So, no blood clots for sure. Which means that I don't have a huge chance of having a stroke. Unfortunately, for my sister, she does. And that worries me for her. I pray that she never has one.
By that Thursday, I had some slight swelling in my left hand. Still numbness in my left hand, but it was not a lot. In fact, it comes and it goes. She ordered an MRI/MRA (to check the blood vessels in my brain), which I just had done this Wednesday. I did have an echo cardiogram done last Wednesday, but no results on that yet.
Last Saturday, fingers in my right hand went numb. I cried. I was home by myself, and terrified something was going to happen. I cried because I was scared, not knowing what was going on in my body. My sister (she is a nurse, by the way) told me in a way it is good that my right side went numb, because it definitely rules out a stroke. All I can think of is, what is happening to my body?
So I dealt with some slight numbness in my right hand and arm this week. On Friday, my right calf started tingling, and it stayed that way for 3.5 hours. I am keeping a symptom/pain diary, so I wrote it down. Yesterday morning, I woke up with major swelling in my hands and arms. Then, I had some numbness in my right calf. Today, light numbness in my left hand, but still lots of swelling.
I am completely scared. I don't want to be alone. I don't understand what is going on in my body.
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
No Negativity Here
We have had a lot of snow this winter. A LOT. It seems that it has occurred every week from the beginning of January until now. The joke in my family a couple of weeks ago is that it was my fault, since we had a snowflake tablecloth on our dining room table from Dec. 27th until about 2 weeks ago when I took it off. Ever since then, we had the majority of snow then. Then, we got another round of snow, and I told them all it was not my fault, since the table cloth was already off the table. :)
A lot of people are sick of the snow, of the nasty cold temperatures we have had, sick of not seeing the sun numerous days. It's caused havoc everywhere. But I refuse to think negatively about it. A person can't. There isn't anything we can do about the weather, it comes and goes as it pleases. There is a reason for it to happen, and God knows the reason why he gave us all the snow.
That brings me to another thing not to be negative about.
When we bought our house in August, within 3 days of moving in, our unfinished basement had water coming through the drain. A lot. So C and my Dad plugged it, and we went on our merry way. Until last Wednesday morning. I was in the shower, and C told me to get out, because we had water in the basement. It came from the toilet in the finished part of the basement, flooding that room, which is also our laundry room. It seeped out to the carpet in the adjoining room. We think that flooded because the drain in the unfinished part was plugged, and it had no where else to go. So, a man came out and snaked the drain, basically. There is a shrub right next to the house, and it is the reason for the drain backing up. There are roots from that shrub growing into the pipe. So, it was fixed.
Then, on Saturday, it happened again, this time it wasn't clean water. Nasty, I know. And this time, it was only in the unfinished basement part. The man who fixed it last week came back out and fixed the drain, yanking out several shrub roots. I was really sick that day (because of the meds I am taking), so I spent a lot of time in bed. But C told me that they found lots of roots. The man said he would keep coming back out until we get it fixed permanently this Spring.
I told my sister that the shrub and several next to it are going bye-bye, and that I will plant flowers in their honor.
It happened for a reason. I can't think negatively about it. I can't say, "What else could go wrong?" Because it's life, and things like this happen.
29 days until Spring. I am ready for warmer weather, for creating my garden, and the lots of around-the-house projects that await us. They include: installing patio doors in our dining room and taking out the double windows, closing up the door in the kitchen (because the patio doors will be the entry way now), taking out the shrubs, and other various outside projects.
A lot of people are sick of the snow, of the nasty cold temperatures we have had, sick of not seeing the sun numerous days. It's caused havoc everywhere. But I refuse to think negatively about it. A person can't. There isn't anything we can do about the weather, it comes and goes as it pleases. There is a reason for it to happen, and God knows the reason why he gave us all the snow.
That brings me to another thing not to be negative about.
When we bought our house in August, within 3 days of moving in, our unfinished basement had water coming through the drain. A lot. So C and my Dad plugged it, and we went on our merry way. Until last Wednesday morning. I was in the shower, and C told me to get out, because we had water in the basement. It came from the toilet in the finished part of the basement, flooding that room, which is also our laundry room. It seeped out to the carpet in the adjoining room. We think that flooded because the drain in the unfinished part was plugged, and it had no where else to go. So, a man came out and snaked the drain, basically. There is a shrub right next to the house, and it is the reason for the drain backing up. There are roots from that shrub growing into the pipe. So, it was fixed.
Then, on Saturday, it happened again, this time it wasn't clean water. Nasty, I know. And this time, it was only in the unfinished basement part. The man who fixed it last week came back out and fixed the drain, yanking out several shrub roots. I was really sick that day (because of the meds I am taking), so I spent a lot of time in bed. But C told me that they found lots of roots. The man said he would keep coming back out until we get it fixed permanently this Spring.
I told my sister that the shrub and several next to it are going bye-bye, and that I will plant flowers in their honor.
It happened for a reason. I can't think negatively about it. I can't say, "What else could go wrong?" Because it's life, and things like this happen.
29 days until Spring. I am ready for warmer weather, for creating my garden, and the lots of around-the-house projects that await us. They include: installing patio doors in our dining room and taking out the double windows, closing up the door in the kitchen (because the patio doors will be the entry way now), taking out the shrubs, and other various outside projects.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
A New Year...
Happy New Year!
I rang in the new year with a nice chest cold. It actually started on Saturday. I woke up with it, coughing, and feeling very yucky. I had no symptoms before that except a stuffed nose, but I almost always have a stuffy nose due to sinus/allergies. So that I am used to. So, anyways, there I was, preparing for our last Christmas this year, and it was even hosted at our new house. All I wanted to do was go back to bed, I was so miserable. I am pretty certain I had a fever that day, as I kept saying that it was incredibly warm in my house. It just so happened to be around 40 degrees outside anyway, but I swore it was so hot in my house. I ended up opening some windows and sitting near one of them for quite awhile.
The last of our guests left Sunday. I had plans to take down my Christmas decorations, but after I came down with the nasty chest cold, I decided to just rest. I finally felt a little better to take the Christmas decorations down yesterday. Still coughing. Strangely, I developed a more stuffed nose and a sore throat yesterday. I thought that was odd, since I usually get those first.While I don't like being sick, I am grateful to be on break, and to be able to recuperate at home.
A lot of people make resolutions. I even have made them in the past. However, I tend not to stick to them after awhile. I decided to do something different this year. Instead, I will make goals and things/people I want to focus more on in this year.
Without further ado, here are my goals/what I want to focus more on:
1. My relationship with God. It falters at times. I want to pray more, read the bible more, go to church more.
2. Doing more for others/giving back. I do a lot now, but I don't want to lose sight of that. A perfect example is my nephew. We were at the grocery store once, and he thought some older woman needed help. So he asked me first if he could ask her if she needed help. My heart warmed at the thought. So he asked her. I don't think she necessarily realized that he wanted to help her, but she was still kind to him. We all need to be more like him in our lives. He is such a great example of doing for others/giving back.
3. Take photographs more. I used to take a ton of photographs where ever I went. Sadly, I got away from it, all because of a stupid comment someone made over 5 years ago. That person told me I took way too many photos of the exact same thing. It was of foothills in Arizona, by the way. I let that comment get the best of me. I have always loved taking photographs, so I need to get back into it.
4a. Run more. Once I get over being sick, I am going back to running. I enjoy it. There is something about it that soothes me. Not only do I have a goal to run more, I have a goal to run more 5k's. I ran 2 this past year- two more than any year. Heck, I had never ran a 5k until 2013 anyway, so that's an accomplishment in itself. My first 5k I came in 36:39. That was an amazing time! It was super cold that day in April. Then, I ran another 5k on Thanksgiving. I ran it in 34:27. I beat my previous time by 2 minutes, 12 seconds. That was my goal that day. My goal now is to run in even less time by next 5k, and I know I can do it. I am super competitive, but only towards myself. I see something and think, "I can do that, too!"
4b. Coinciding with running more is being more physically and actively fit. I want to be in better shape for ME.
4c. Also with this, I want to continue to lose weight. I want to start with small goal weights and go from there. My mentality is "I can, so I will!"
5. I want to learn to knit. Laugh all you want, peeps! But seriously. I once had a roommate in college who knit all the time, and she was only 19. I was interested, but definitely couldn't hang. So I don't know how to knit. My goal this year is to teach myself how to knit.
6. (This one follows #5) Learning to crochet. I know very basic crochet. Very basic. As in, use the same pattern (which isn't much) to create blankets and scarves. So, I want to learn to crochet more. My grandmother on my Dad's side was big into crochet. I have many things she has made, including a blanket, barbie clothes, and Christmas decorations.
7. This also follows #5 and 6. I have knitting looms. So I plan to use those more as well this coming year. I want to use both the knitting needles for #5 and the knitting looms as well.
8. Do more drawings and paintings. I need to get back into my Zentangles more. Even if it's 5 minutes a day. I also want to do more oil paintings. However, that will take more than just 5 minutes a day. Art makes me happy.
9. Cook more, eat out less. Not that we eat out a whole lot as it is, but I just need do cook more. I enjoy cooking and baking. I need to get better about planning meals.
10. Do more once I get home. Sometimes I am so tired when I get home that I don't want to do anything. It's time to get out of that mindset and push myself further by doing more.
11. Spend more time with those I love and spend more time with friends.
12. *just added* I want to learn to be more of a gardener. I want to grow my own veggie garden and also care for any plants indoors and out. I want to gain knowledge in the ones that I have, starting with my peace lily I received almost 3 years ago. It hasn't bloomed in 2.5 years, and I just read up in why it hadn't. So hopefully this spring and summer, it will bloom now.
If I think of things, I will add them to my list. :) In a year from now, I want to come back to my list of goals, and know that I have hit them all.
I rang in the new year with a nice chest cold. It actually started on Saturday. I woke up with it, coughing, and feeling very yucky. I had no symptoms before that except a stuffed nose, but I almost always have a stuffy nose due to sinus/allergies. So that I am used to. So, anyways, there I was, preparing for our last Christmas this year, and it was even hosted at our new house. All I wanted to do was go back to bed, I was so miserable. I am pretty certain I had a fever that day, as I kept saying that it was incredibly warm in my house. It just so happened to be around 40 degrees outside anyway, but I swore it was so hot in my house. I ended up opening some windows and sitting near one of them for quite awhile.
The last of our guests left Sunday. I had plans to take down my Christmas decorations, but after I came down with the nasty chest cold, I decided to just rest. I finally felt a little better to take the Christmas decorations down yesterday. Still coughing. Strangely, I developed a more stuffed nose and a sore throat yesterday. I thought that was odd, since I usually get those first.While I don't like being sick, I am grateful to be on break, and to be able to recuperate at home.
A lot of people make resolutions. I even have made them in the past. However, I tend not to stick to them after awhile. I decided to do something different this year. Instead, I will make goals and things/people I want to focus more on in this year.
Without further ado, here are my goals/what I want to focus more on:
1. My relationship with God. It falters at times. I want to pray more, read the bible more, go to church more.
2. Doing more for others/giving back. I do a lot now, but I don't want to lose sight of that. A perfect example is my nephew. We were at the grocery store once, and he thought some older woman needed help. So he asked me first if he could ask her if she needed help. My heart warmed at the thought. So he asked her. I don't think she necessarily realized that he wanted to help her, but she was still kind to him. We all need to be more like him in our lives. He is such a great example of doing for others/giving back.
3. Take photographs more. I used to take a ton of photographs where ever I went. Sadly, I got away from it, all because of a stupid comment someone made over 5 years ago. That person told me I took way too many photos of the exact same thing. It was of foothills in Arizona, by the way. I let that comment get the best of me. I have always loved taking photographs, so I need to get back into it.
4a. Run more. Once I get over being sick, I am going back to running. I enjoy it. There is something about it that soothes me. Not only do I have a goal to run more, I have a goal to run more 5k's. I ran 2 this past year- two more than any year. Heck, I had never ran a 5k until 2013 anyway, so that's an accomplishment in itself. My first 5k I came in 36:39. That was an amazing time! It was super cold that day in April. Then, I ran another 5k on Thanksgiving. I ran it in 34:27. I beat my previous time by 2 minutes, 12 seconds. That was my goal that day. My goal now is to run in even less time by next 5k, and I know I can do it. I am super competitive, but only towards myself. I see something and think, "I can do that, too!"
4b. Coinciding with running more is being more physically and actively fit. I want to be in better shape for ME.
4c. Also with this, I want to continue to lose weight. I want to start with small goal weights and go from there. My mentality is "I can, so I will!"
5. I want to learn to knit. Laugh all you want, peeps! But seriously. I once had a roommate in college who knit all the time, and she was only 19. I was interested, but definitely couldn't hang. So I don't know how to knit. My goal this year is to teach myself how to knit.
6. (This one follows #5) Learning to crochet. I know very basic crochet. Very basic. As in, use the same pattern (which isn't much) to create blankets and scarves. So, I want to learn to crochet more. My grandmother on my Dad's side was big into crochet. I have many things she has made, including a blanket, barbie clothes, and Christmas decorations.
7. This also follows #5 and 6. I have knitting looms. So I plan to use those more as well this coming year. I want to use both the knitting needles for #5 and the knitting looms as well.
8. Do more drawings and paintings. I need to get back into my Zentangles more. Even if it's 5 minutes a day. I also want to do more oil paintings. However, that will take more than just 5 minutes a day. Art makes me happy.
9. Cook more, eat out less. Not that we eat out a whole lot as it is, but I just need do cook more. I enjoy cooking and baking. I need to get better about planning meals.
10. Do more once I get home. Sometimes I am so tired when I get home that I don't want to do anything. It's time to get out of that mindset and push myself further by doing more.
11. Spend more time with those I love and spend more time with friends.
12. *just added* I want to learn to be more of a gardener. I want to grow my own veggie garden and also care for any plants indoors and out. I want to gain knowledge in the ones that I have, starting with my peace lily I received almost 3 years ago. It hasn't bloomed in 2.5 years, and I just read up in why it hadn't. So hopefully this spring and summer, it will bloom now.
If I think of things, I will add them to my list. :) In a year from now, I want to come back to my list of goals, and know that I have hit them all.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
A Rambling…
I don’t even know where I am going with this post, quite a few thoughts just rolled into 1 tonight.
1. I’m super protective of using sun screen when I am outside. I am pale and burn pretty easily as it is without it. In high school, it was the "cool” thing to turn to the tanning beds. Not me, even then, I wanted no part of tanning beds. I knew enough them about skin care/skin cancer that I didn’t want to risk it. And yet, I won’t put sunscreen on my feet, forearms, or face just to see what tan lines I can get. Odd, I know.
2. I have realized how much I love to garden. Love, love, love. I picked a plastic grocery bag full of green beans tonight. It’s nice knowing where my food comes from. If I can, I want to grow it myself. If I can’t, I want to buy locally produced who don’t use chemicals.
3. Because of the above, I do plan on having a garden at our new place.
4. New place? Did you read that correctly? You did! We are in the process of buying a house right now. I go from being incredibly excited to getting incredibly scared and nervous. It’s an amazing house in an amazing location. Just the money issues are what scares me. I’m keeping mum on what I know about the house until more of it goes through.
5. In said new house, I get to have my very own craft room. YES! I plan to make it mine by the color choices I will use. I can’t wait to have my own studio space again. It’s been killing me not being able to use my materials.
6. I chopped my hair off a month ago, and I instantly regretted it. Yep. I don’t like change very well. Especially when it took a full year to grow it back out to the length that it was. However, it did need a new cut/style. I literally have to remind myself, it’s only hair. It will grow back.
7. I got sick about 3 weeks ago with a sinus cold/allergies, and I am still dealing with it. Feeling sick all the time is pretty new to me, and knowing there isn’t too much I can do for the allergy portion of it annoys me.
8. I’ve begun to lose my momentum with working out because I have been feeling crummy lately due to the cold aforementioned. I need to persevere and just get back into it.
9. I’m ready for school to start again. And I love school supplies probably just as much as art supplies.
10. I need to travel a lot more. Recently, I visited San Antonio, TX, and Green Bay, WI. Loved both of those, but definitely spent more time in TX that trip. I will expound on that more in another post.
And those are my ramblings for the night.
Toodles!
Monday, July 8, 2013
Movin' On!
C and I have been actively house hunting since last month. We at first said months ago that we would wait another year (meaning summer 2014) in this rental house. Then, we came to a decision to start looking for a house of our own. A big reason being, this place is small for the two of us. We have no room to spread out. I feel like every room has some clutter to it because there is no room. I have been telling people it's like the house threw up on itself. No room to go anywhere.
We found this gorgeous house. 4 bedroom, 2 full bath, a half bath. It has enough room to grow, enough room to spread out, and breathe. We put in an offer, it was rejected. We tried again, and it was countered. We accepted, and now we wait for everything to go through.
It's a nerve-wracking, but exciting experience at the same time. But at least we not have to move for a long time!
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
A Look Back To Where I Have Been
It's no secret that I faced some incredibly hard stuff a few years ago. For me, to face what I faced, it was incredibly hard. Mainly because I kept it to myself for over a year before I finally told my family. I didn't want to burden anyone with it, and part of me was too proud, too stubborn in thinking that I could take care of it myself. I kept thinking that it would get better. It never did. In fact, it got so bad at one point, I was ready and willing to end my life. It was also was so bad that I feared for my safety.
Finally, I decided either I was going to change myself or stay in that position. But I had to do it myself, no one could do it for me. No one swayed my decision. And it was a tough decision to make. But I did make a choice, and I never looked back on that choice with regret. If anything, I have looked on that decision with reflection. I have walked many, many miles to get where I am today.
I love the life I lead. It has opened so many awesome doors for me. That I credibly hard stuff a few years ago taught me a lot about myself. It was a huge learning experience. While it was painful, I am ever so thankful for it. It made me appreciate the people in my life so much more. But mostly, it helped me blossom into the person I am today.
Monday, May 27, 2013
Happy Memorial Day!
Don’t forget to reflect on those who gave their lives for us today. I personally want to thank those who have served in the military-past or present, as well as all police men and women, and fire men and women. The cost of freedom is much more than just freedom, sadly. Thinking of them all today.
It has been a cold, rainy weekend. I honestly have not done too much, and honestly, I am okay with that. I did make about 4 scarves between Saturday and yesterday. I need to work on making more. I make scarfs out of the ruffle yarn (Starbella, Pirouette, Sashay). My goal is to sell them at a festival coming up.
Which reminds me that I also need to get to work on more drawings AND also go back to knitting on the loom(s). Because I have more than 1.
I decided to deactivate my Facebook account after all yesterday. And I already knew it would be hard. It’s the first thing I do every morning once I wake up. There have been rare occasions that I do not do it. But it was something that I did since I got my ipod touch back in 2009, so it may be harder to get out of habit, but I can do it. It’s just so much easier not having to rely on Facebook. I figure if people want to know about me, they will call/text/email/visit.
I think it will be a struggle the first few days, because it has been a part of my life. Even the little bit that I was checking it every day. But once I go without it for awhile, it will be a distant memory. It really is overused a lot, anyway. Some people post way too much information about their lives. And some use it as a means of insulting people but not actually saying their names. I don’t do either of those, and I steer clear of someone who does.
Other than that, it’s a pretty lazy weekend. I didn’t sleep well last night, so I am thinking of taking a nap.
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Liberating
Recently, there was a convo on a radio program about one of the emcees asking if he should delete his Facebook profile. A lit of people called or texted in that they deleted it from their phones for a short period. One person said they deactivated it 6 months ago, and never looked back.
There are people I have on Facebook that I want to block, but really can't. And I can't go into that on here. I am tired of even sharing links, sharing news, uploading photos of my artwork, for various reasons. But I didn't know how to stop people from knowing my business, even the little I put out there. I struggled with deactivation, deleting it all together, or just deleting it from my mobile devices. In the end, I chose deleting from my mobile devices, because I use those the most than my laptop. I did that a bit ago, and felt the liberation that others have said they got from it. Now, I don't have to worry about certain people because I won't be posting on it. I didn't spend a lot of time on there normally, but I still think the times I did spend on it will be better used towards something more productive. I am going to go all Summer without it, and then hopefully continue in the Fall. A lot of people live and breathe Facebook, but not me. At one time, when it was first introduced to the world, I did. But now, there are more important things in life to think about.
If this doesn't work, the next step is deactivation. However, I think this will work just fine.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
5k Check In!
As I sit here drinking my Gevalia chocolate mocha coffee, I am giving yo all an update in my running world.
The coffee is good, by the way. Comparable to Donut House's chocolate glazed donuts.
I ran my first 5k last Saturday!
In the cold.
And with a cold.
But I done it, nonetheless.
I went with my sister and our friend. We ended up stopping a couple of times and just walking, because we were going up hill. I think we walked a quarter of a mile, total. I kicked it into high gear nearing the finish line so we could finish strong.
I thought our times were 39 minutes and some seconds. But I wouldn't find out until Monday that I actually finished in 36:33. Woot! I am so proud of myself! This gives me a starting point, and a goal to improve on.
A cool side note: after the race, I signed up at this running booth to win a free pair of New Balance shoes. I didn't win the shoes, but I won an awesome t- shirt, a kick ass water bottle, and socks made for running! I rarely win things, so this was cool!
Happy running!
The coffee is good, by the way. Comparable to Donut House's chocolate glazed donuts.
I ran my first 5k last Saturday!
In the cold.
And with a cold.
But I done it, nonetheless.
I went with my sister and our friend. We ended up stopping a couple of times and just walking, because we were going up hill. I think we walked a quarter of a mile, total. I kicked it into high gear nearing the finish line so we could finish strong.
I thought our times were 39 minutes and some seconds. But I wouldn't find out until Monday that I actually finished in 36:33. Woot! I am so proud of myself! This gives me a starting point, and a goal to improve on.
A cool side note: after the race, I signed up at this running booth to win a free pair of New Balance shoes. I didn't win the shoes, but I won an awesome t- shirt, a kick ass water bottle, and socks made for running! I rarely win things, so this was cool!
Happy running!
Monday, April 1, 2013
It's never too late...
To be what you might have been.
3 months ago, I set a goal for myself. I wanted to get back in shape. I became very sedentary in the past year and a half. I didn't like how I looked anymore. I knew that I was the only one who could change it.
So I began working out. It was hard at first. It was easy to say, "not tonight, I am tired." But I went. Granted, there have been times when I have had other things going on, and I either can't go or can't spend a lot of time there.
I started out on the Elliptical machine, and I switched to the treadmill about a month ago- maybe a little longer.I set small goals for myself, starting out solid running at 6 minutes. One time, I was planning on running 18 minutes, and had to stop at 14 minutes because my side was hurting.
Tonight, I am proud to say that I not only hit the 3-mile mark in running, but I also ran for 37 minutes! This is a huge accomplishment for me, as I have never been a runner. I hope to run my first 5k in just a few months.
This leading to bigger and better things.
So, that old saying, "it is never too late to be what you might have been" is so true.
3 months ago, I set a goal for myself. I wanted to get back in shape. I became very sedentary in the past year and a half. I didn't like how I looked anymore. I knew that I was the only one who could change it.
So I began working out. It was hard at first. It was easy to say, "not tonight, I am tired." But I went. Granted, there have been times when I have had other things going on, and I either can't go or can't spend a lot of time there.
I started out on the Elliptical machine, and I switched to the treadmill about a month ago- maybe a little longer.I set small goals for myself, starting out solid running at 6 minutes. One time, I was planning on running 18 minutes, and had to stop at 14 minutes because my side was hurting.
Tonight, I am proud to say that I not only hit the 3-mile mark in running, but I also ran for 37 minutes! This is a huge accomplishment for me, as I have never been a runner. I hope to run my first 5k in just a few months.
This leading to bigger and better things.
So, that old saying, "it is never too late to be what you might have been" is so true.
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Where do I begin?
I have not blogged in quite awhile! Life has been incredibly busy since August. Incredibly busy. Busier than I have ever been in the past 2 years combined.
I picked up some extra curriculars at school, I picked up committees, still taking classes. I feel like my weekends have been so jam-packed. When we had break, it was so nice not to have any where I needed to be. It was nice not to have to look at my planner and plan around everything already set up. But the minute we came back from break, it all started up again.
I'm not complaining, so please don't think I am. Just saying that I have been uber busy. I wished to myself last year that I wanted to be kept busy.
One of the things that has been quickly slipping away is my physical health. It makes me sad when I realize how much I have gained in the past year and a half. I eat Subway every so often, or a salad from a local resturant around here. But it's been motivation and lack of energy for me. When I get home from school, I'm tired. I'm fighting to find the energy to get something done. Maybe there is something else going on? I don't know. I take my vitamins daily. C says when I lie on my back when sleeping at night, he has noticed I stop breathing.
Let me say that I know I need to get that checked out. I KNOW I DO. Sleep Apnea runs in my family. I have only noticed being this tired in the past year. There is a possibility it's a thyroid issue. That also has hit some family members. Even right now, the bags under my eyes are burning, because I am so tired. I should not be this tired. I go to bed on time, get up 8 hours later. I have always been structured like that- I need the sleep. Especially in my profession. I have to take care of myself. So I will try to get in to see the Dr. early next month about that all.
Speaking of taking care of myself...
Because I have been so unhappy with how I look, I made a goal to myself to start this year fresh. When Jan. 1st came rolling in, I was eager and ready to begin. I have lost 5 pounds since January 1st. I've been drinking more water, watching what I eat so much more, working out when I can. Except lsat week- I took the entire week off and I just knew that I would have gained back what I lost. To my surprise, it was kept off. By pushing myself to work out even when I am extremely tired and do not have any energy, through the choices I have made in eating habits, drinking more water, it has all helped.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a foodie. I love to bake. I love to cook. It makes my heart happy, and it will always be something that I enjoy. However, I eat smaller portions, drink more water. When grocery shopping, I always have to look at the goodies and get a craving. I always think, ugh, if I had just one...But I never ever stop, not even before. If I bake anything at home, it's always natural ingredients, and I only have a piece. I think I get more of a rush out of baking than I do in the actual sweets themselves. :D
When I am at the gym, I push myself as hard as I can. I love the fact that I sweat (even though it's gross), because it means I am seeing results. It's going to be slow for awhile, but I know I will keep at this. Someone that I know has been working out for 2 years now. I've always know what they looked like before they became seriously hard-core at the gym. But now, they are almost a different person. They are my inspiration. And any person who refuses to give up.
I can and WILL do this.
I picked up some extra curriculars at school, I picked up committees, still taking classes. I feel like my weekends have been so jam-packed. When we had break, it was so nice not to have any where I needed to be. It was nice not to have to look at my planner and plan around everything already set up. But the minute we came back from break, it all started up again.
I'm not complaining, so please don't think I am. Just saying that I have been uber busy. I wished to myself last year that I wanted to be kept busy.
One of the things that has been quickly slipping away is my physical health. It makes me sad when I realize how much I have gained in the past year and a half. I eat Subway every so often, or a salad from a local resturant around here. But it's been motivation and lack of energy for me. When I get home from school, I'm tired. I'm fighting to find the energy to get something done. Maybe there is something else going on? I don't know. I take my vitamins daily. C says when I lie on my back when sleeping at night, he has noticed I stop breathing.
Let me say that I know I need to get that checked out. I KNOW I DO. Sleep Apnea runs in my family. I have only noticed being this tired in the past year. There is a possibility it's a thyroid issue. That also has hit some family members. Even right now, the bags under my eyes are burning, because I am so tired. I should not be this tired. I go to bed on time, get up 8 hours later. I have always been structured like that- I need the sleep. Especially in my profession. I have to take care of myself. So I will try to get in to see the Dr. early next month about that all.
Speaking of taking care of myself...
Because I have been so unhappy with how I look, I made a goal to myself to start this year fresh. When Jan. 1st came rolling in, I was eager and ready to begin. I have lost 5 pounds since January 1st. I've been drinking more water, watching what I eat so much more, working out when I can. Except lsat week- I took the entire week off and I just knew that I would have gained back what I lost. To my surprise, it was kept off. By pushing myself to work out even when I am extremely tired and do not have any energy, through the choices I have made in eating habits, drinking more water, it has all helped.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a foodie. I love to bake. I love to cook. It makes my heart happy, and it will always be something that I enjoy. However, I eat smaller portions, drink more water. When grocery shopping, I always have to look at the goodies and get a craving. I always think, ugh, if I had just one...But I never ever stop, not even before. If I bake anything at home, it's always natural ingredients, and I only have a piece. I think I get more of a rush out of baking than I do in the actual sweets themselves. :D
When I am at the gym, I push myself as hard as I can. I love the fact that I sweat (even though it's gross), because it means I am seeing results. It's going to be slow for awhile, but I know I will keep at this. Someone that I know has been working out for 2 years now. I've always know what they looked like before they became seriously hard-core at the gym. But now, they are almost a different person. They are my inspiration. And any person who refuses to give up.
I can and WILL do this.
Monday, July 23, 2012
July 23rd, 2010
I am going back in time to a night 2 years ago.
A night that holds a special place in my relationship, in my heart, and in my mind forever.
DB and I were talking on the phone that night. He was in a hotel (I thought in Singapore?), having to check out in a bit to get back to the ship. It was 9:45 PM-my time, meaning it was 11:45 AM-his time. At 9:50, he realized he needed to go, and it got really hard.
I started crying, and he started babbling about where he was going next, when we would talk again, etc. He had never done that before, so I knew how much it affected him as well. I knew I had to tell him, couldn't let this moment slip by me. And then, I blurted out, "I love you." He replied, "I love you, too." I can't remember what else we said in those few precious moments, but that much will always stay with me.
He says that it technically doesn't count as today, because it's not the 24th yet. I told him he was wrong, it was today for me. :)
So, while it hasn't always been a bed of roses, it has been a memorable 3 years, 5 months. and 9 days of being together.
A night that holds a special place in my relationship, in my heart, and in my mind forever.
DB and I were talking on the phone that night. He was in a hotel (I thought in Singapore?), having to check out in a bit to get back to the ship. It was 9:45 PM-my time, meaning it was 11:45 AM-his time. At 9:50, he realized he needed to go, and it got really hard.
I started crying, and he started babbling about where he was going next, when we would talk again, etc. He had never done that before, so I knew how much it affected him as well. I knew I had to tell him, couldn't let this moment slip by me. And then, I blurted out, "I love you." He replied, "I love you, too." I can't remember what else we said in those few precious moments, but that much will always stay with me.
He says that it technically doesn't count as today, because it's not the 24th yet. I told him he was wrong, it was today for me. :)
So, while it hasn't always been a bed of roses, it has been a memorable 3 years, 5 months. and 9 days of being together.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
When Life Gives You Zucchini...
Make Zucchini bread, Zucchini lasagna, and Zucchini cream pie!
:D
Seriously, my dad has this beautiful garden, and it has produced a lot of zucchini, among other vegetables. Some were massive. One large zucchini (which was probably about 3 smaller ones combined) produced 8 loaves of zucchini bread, and I only got about halfway through it!
Instead of using noodles, use zucchini for zucchini lasagna- it's good! Tastes great, and it's healthy for us!
Now, I am baking zucchini cream pie (for reals, look it up). It's like a sugar cream pie (I believe it's a southern thing, but my brother always loved it growing up), but with zucchini and a little sugar instead of a lot.
Which brings me to the point of my post...(in a round about way)...
When C came home almost a month ago, the day after he came home we went to look at a rental house. We had already been talking about it for a week, We really wanted out of my apartment, as we had both been tired of renting apartments, but weren't quite ready for a house of our own just yet.
This house literally fell into our laps a month ago. It's perfect! It's being completely renovated- new kitchen- AHH! My heart belongs in the kitchen, so I am ecstatic about that. Way more than ecstatic. I can finally keep out things like my Kitchenaid, the blender, etc, and not have to worry about putting something else away.
I see all these cute things, and think, "that will look cute in our new house."
So...I gave my apartment complex our 30 day notice we will be moving out, and into our new place on the 1st.
I get a call yesterday that they aren't going to be done by the 1st, can we move in the 15th? What will that do to our current living situation? I talked to my property manager, and she said that this apartment is already rented on the 1st. Alright, so we're kind of homeless for 15 or so days.
Move in date just happens to fall right when school starts for me.
Both sets of parents said we can move in with them for a couple of weeks, put our major stuff in storage, keep out what we need.
I refuse to stress over something that I cannot control. I will continue to pack, continue to work on my lesson plans, getting it all ready for the big move(s).
In a way, it's nice not having to pay another month of rent here, which means when I get paid on Friday, I will have extra income! C and I have talked about it, and we are going to use it to pay some bills, which is fine. Take care of that, less we have to continue paying on.
Surprisingly, I feel pretty calm about everything. I'm packing slowly. I know I will need to leave out some nice clothes for school and church, some to play around in, and leave out my school stuff, my drawing supplies, etc. We will get it all taken care of, God is with us.
Now, I think both of my pies are completely done!
Ciao!
:D
Seriously, my dad has this beautiful garden, and it has produced a lot of zucchini, among other vegetables. Some were massive. One large zucchini (which was probably about 3 smaller ones combined) produced 8 loaves of zucchini bread, and I only got about halfway through it!
Instead of using noodles, use zucchini for zucchini lasagna- it's good! Tastes great, and it's healthy for us!
Now, I am baking zucchini cream pie (for reals, look it up). It's like a sugar cream pie (I believe it's a southern thing, but my brother always loved it growing up), but with zucchini and a little sugar instead of a lot.
Which brings me to the point of my post...(in a round about way)...
When C came home almost a month ago, the day after he came home we went to look at a rental house. We had already been talking about it for a week, We really wanted out of my apartment, as we had both been tired of renting apartments, but weren't quite ready for a house of our own just yet.
This house literally fell into our laps a month ago. It's perfect! It's being completely renovated- new kitchen- AHH! My heart belongs in the kitchen, so I am ecstatic about that. Way more than ecstatic. I can finally keep out things like my Kitchenaid, the blender, etc, and not have to worry about putting something else away.
I see all these cute things, and think, "that will look cute in our new house."
So...I gave my apartment complex our 30 day notice we will be moving out, and into our new place on the 1st.
I get a call yesterday that they aren't going to be done by the 1st, can we move in the 15th? What will that do to our current living situation? I talked to my property manager, and she said that this apartment is already rented on the 1st. Alright, so we're kind of homeless for 15 or so days.
Move in date just happens to fall right when school starts for me.
Both sets of parents said we can move in with them for a couple of weeks, put our major stuff in storage, keep out what we need.
I refuse to stress over something that I cannot control. I will continue to pack, continue to work on my lesson plans, getting it all ready for the big move(s).
In a way, it's nice not having to pay another month of rent here, which means when I get paid on Friday, I will have extra income! C and I have talked about it, and we are going to use it to pay some bills, which is fine. Take care of that, less we have to continue paying on.
Surprisingly, I feel pretty calm about everything. I'm packing slowly. I know I will need to leave out some nice clothes for school and church, some to play around in, and leave out my school stuff, my drawing supplies, etc. We will get it all taken care of, God is with us.
Now, I think both of my pies are completely done!
Ciao!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
I wish...
I had the answers.
I felt more confident and secure.
I trusted more.
I actually knew without guessing.
I could read minds.
I could let certain things roll off my back.
I were more nonchalant.
I didn't think the thoughts I am thinking.
I weren't so impatient.
I were anonymous.
I wasn't a planner.
I weren't so structured.
I could turn my thoughts off.
I could just say what I am thinking without people judging me.
I didn't keep everything inside.
I would talk more.
I would speak up more when something bothers me.
...I just knew.
I felt more confident and secure.
I trusted more.
I actually knew without guessing.
I could read minds.
I could let certain things roll off my back.
I were more nonchalant.
I didn't think the thoughts I am thinking.
I weren't so impatient.
I were anonymous.
I wasn't a planner.
I weren't so structured.
I could turn my thoughts off.
I could just say what I am thinking without people judging me.
I didn't keep everything inside.
I would talk more.
I would speak up more when something bothers me.
...I just knew.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Eggless Chocolate Chip Cookies
Yum!
That is all I have to say.
I have been craving chocolate chip cookies for almost a week now. We just got back Friday evening, and have gotten only a few necessities from the grocery store. I decided tonight that I wanted chocolate chip cookies, but we had no eggs.
What was I to do??
I looked online (thank goodness for the Internet!), and found a recipe for eggless chocolate chip cookies. They are great! Even C likes them (he was eating the batter with a spoon a bit ago).
Even though it's almost the end of June, for over a week now, I have been thinking it should really be July by now. It has been a busy summer. Things are slowing down a little, but not by much. My summer class ends in 2 weeks, art camp is over on Friday, and C and I have finally moved in together.
But, wait! That's not all!
(I feel like the announcer dude on the Price Is Right)
"Tell them what else they have won, Bob."
Alright, so get this.
I have 4 training sessions between mid July and early August that I will be doing for school.
I need to get back into my classroom, to get everything ready for the coming year.
I need to re-work some units, add to others for this coming year.
I need to get every unit ready so that I can begin to upload it to my lesson planner.
I have decided to open some of my Zentangle pieces for the upcoming fair, so I need to go through those and decide which ones to put in, and then frame them.
AND...
We found a house to rent! Oh happy day! (More on that in a minute)
So this means I *we* need to pack...again.
The move home from Virginia went well! Very minor things happened that someday we can look back on and laugh- stories to tell our children. Although, driving a Uhaul pulling a car behind with a tow dolly is not fun at all. I felt like we were at a rock concert at times because we were head bangin' so much. The mountains weren't so bad- there were times I was nervous, but I knew that C would get us out of there safely.
We got back Friday night, and had an appointment to go look at a house we have been talking about for about a week. A family bought the house (which was a foreclosed home) and is fixing it up. I'm talking, pretty much everything is new. The kitchen will be awesome when it is done- bigger than what we have now. More space, which is what we need. I want this place to be both of ours- not just all of my stuff in one place. It really is a great house for a great price, and I can't wait until we move in August 1st.
I need to finish baking my cookies before C eats all the batter. :D I kid, he stopped eating it awhile ago.
That is all I have to say.
I have been craving chocolate chip cookies for almost a week now. We just got back Friday evening, and have gotten only a few necessities from the grocery store. I decided tonight that I wanted chocolate chip cookies, but we had no eggs.
What was I to do??
I looked online (thank goodness for the Internet!), and found a recipe for eggless chocolate chip cookies. They are great! Even C likes them (he was eating the batter with a spoon a bit ago).
Even though it's almost the end of June, for over a week now, I have been thinking it should really be July by now. It has been a busy summer. Things are slowing down a little, but not by much. My summer class ends in 2 weeks, art camp is over on Friday, and C and I have finally moved in together.
But, wait! That's not all!
(I feel like the announcer dude on the Price Is Right)
"Tell them what else they have won, Bob."
Alright, so get this.
I have 4 training sessions between mid July and early August that I will be doing for school.
I need to get back into my classroom, to get everything ready for the coming year.
I need to re-work some units, add to others for this coming year.
I need to get every unit ready so that I can begin to upload it to my lesson planner.
I have decided to open some of my Zentangle pieces for the upcoming fair, so I need to go through those and decide which ones to put in, and then frame them.
AND...
We found a house to rent! Oh happy day! (More on that in a minute)
So this means I *we* need to pack...again.
The move home from Virginia went well! Very minor things happened that someday we can look back on and laugh- stories to tell our children. Although, driving a Uhaul pulling a car behind with a tow dolly is not fun at all. I felt like we were at a rock concert at times because we were head bangin' so much. The mountains weren't so bad- there were times I was nervous, but I knew that C would get us out of there safely.
We got back Friday night, and had an appointment to go look at a house we have been talking about for about a week. A family bought the house (which was a foreclosed home) and is fixing it up. I'm talking, pretty much everything is new. The kitchen will be awesome when it is done- bigger than what we have now. More space, which is what we need. I want this place to be both of ours- not just all of my stuff in one place. It really is a great house for a great price, and I can't wait until we move in August 1st.
I need to finish baking my cookies before C eats all the batter. :D I kid, he stopped eating it awhile ago.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Weird Dream
I had this dream right before I woke up this morning that was incredibly strange. I think I was some kind of undercover agent. I remember someone stealing my wallet that my identification in it and being upset about my various identities.
So, then, I was eating red, white and blue peppermint patty bites. You know, like the Hershey bites, the Reese's bites, etc. But they were patriotic. I somehow got blue on my khaki pants, and had just commented to someone that I couldn't believe I did that. This woman says, "I have done that before. I got out the stain using a caramel apple pie." I must have looked at her funny, because she said it again. In my dream, I decided I would need to try this, and that she would be a new friend.
What a strange dream! And to remember the last part- especially in color- awesome! I still don't know why I dreamt of food, though.
So, then, I was eating red, white and blue peppermint patty bites. You know, like the Hershey bites, the Reese's bites, etc. But they were patriotic. I somehow got blue on my khaki pants, and had just commented to someone that I couldn't believe I did that. This woman says, "I have done that before. I got out the stain using a caramel apple pie." I must have looked at her funny, because she said it again. In my dream, I decided I would need to try this, and that she would be a new friend.
What a strange dream! And to remember the last part- especially in color- awesome! I still don't know why I dreamt of food, though.
Saturday, June 9, 2012
A Walk Down Memory Lane
In preparation for C's arrival, I have been condensing things in my apartment. Either I am putting things in totes to put in storage, or they are being given away/being sold at a garage sale. I have a couple of totes that have items from my childhood in them. One of the totes has graduation cards from high school, my cap and gown, and other mementos from high school. I went through my graduation cards (I can only surmise that I kept them because it was people in my life?) this afternoon. I kept those from very close friends, my grandparents, and some family. What struck me as sad is that as I went through them, I found about a handful from people who have passed away in the last decade- a couple passed away within a year of my graduating high school.
I have started to go through my clothes again, but haven't gotten very far. I need to get a couple more totes to put more items from my childhood in. I think I'm giving my parents my very nice desk/hutch combo that I just bought a year ago. I haven't used it in months, plus it's taking up space in the living room. I wanted to move it upstairs, but it's incredibly heavy. I'll put my office items in a three-drawer cabinet, using the art desk I already have set up stairs. It will free up just a bit more room for us both. Because I don't have a lot of pantry space (a huge annoyance!), all of the food items are currently taking up the 1 shelf, and using the 3-tiered metal shelf I have in there. I'm going to go through books that I have in the spare bedroom, box up what I don't want to keep out and put in storage, and use the 2 small bookcases for storing food on. At least, 1 of those will fit for sure in the pantry.
C and I were talking the other day about our items. He doesn't have a lot of kitchen items- which is a plus for me. He is bringing his 2 computers, a printer, his living room furniture, 2 small entertainment centers, a bed, frame and headboard, and that might be it. He doesn't have a lot in general, but I want him to feel that it is his place as well as mine. Plus, when I moved in, I knew I would be there by a year by myself. Although, I didn't know if we would be moving or not.
I finally got my KitchenAid all set up- it only took me almost 6 months. :) I didn't have room before and now I do. I just need to order a cover for it. Currently, I am on Amazon looking for one that I like that goes with my theme in the kitchen. That, and trying to find something close to the colors I have in there- I wish I had thought to check the place where I got them from a few months ago. I really like the colors I picked out.
All in good time. :)
I have started to go through my clothes again, but haven't gotten very far. I need to get a couple more totes to put more items from my childhood in. I think I'm giving my parents my very nice desk/hutch combo that I just bought a year ago. I haven't used it in months, plus it's taking up space in the living room. I wanted to move it upstairs, but it's incredibly heavy. I'll put my office items in a three-drawer cabinet, using the art desk I already have set up stairs. It will free up just a bit more room for us both. Because I don't have a lot of pantry space (a huge annoyance!), all of the food items are currently taking up the 1 shelf, and using the 3-tiered metal shelf I have in there. I'm going to go through books that I have in the spare bedroom, box up what I don't want to keep out and put in storage, and use the 2 small bookcases for storing food on. At least, 1 of those will fit for sure in the pantry.
C and I were talking the other day about our items. He doesn't have a lot of kitchen items- which is a plus for me. He is bringing his 2 computers, a printer, his living room furniture, 2 small entertainment centers, a bed, frame and headboard, and that might be it. He doesn't have a lot in general, but I want him to feel that it is his place as well as mine. Plus, when I moved in, I knew I would be there by a year by myself. Although, I didn't know if we would be moving or not.
I finally got my KitchenAid all set up- it only took me almost 6 months. :) I didn't have room before and now I do. I just need to order a cover for it. Currently, I am on Amazon looking for one that I like that goes with my theme in the kitchen. That, and trying to find something close to the colors I have in there- I wish I had thought to check the place where I got them from a few months ago. I really like the colors I picked out.
All in good time. :)
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Happy Birthday!
Today, my Escape turns 1!
Well, it's not really a year old, but I bought it a year ago today! I remember sitting in the salesman's office, signing papers, excited to finally have it. And it's been a great year. It has taken me out to Virginia to see C, to meet C in Gatlinburg, to work many times, and to top it- even my Grandmother likes it! I think, if she could drive more, she would be driving it.
So, anyways, I've put about 12,000 miles on it in the year that I've had it. I hit 10,000 just before our trip to Gatlinburg. I may be putting on 1,600 more by the end of the month, if I take it to go out and help C move back home.
I'm still in awe of the fact that in just 2 short weeks from tomorrow, we will be on our way home, to my apartment again. This time, we'll be sleeping in the same bed. I'm still in awe that the entire last year flew by. I do remember where I was a year ago, wondering when/if he'd be coming back.
I'm anxious for this, ready for it to happen. The closer we get, the more impatient I get. Although, the more nauseated and stressed I get. See, we have been looking into renting houses. As well as C finding a job. Neither are in our favor yet, and I'm making myself sick over it. I think the biggest thing I feel is that I don't want to let him down.
This is going to mean changes to our relationship. Not bad ones, but ones where we bot have to get used to being around each other more than a few days at a time. I'll have to get used to his snoring (he says I do, but NO! He does!), he'll have to get used to the fact that I rarely sleep without blankets (I like to be all bundled up), that I try not to waste things, etc. But all in all, we pretty much know how each other is, so it's not like this will be a huge shock.
I love my mom, but sometimes she'll say things like, "well, you know, this isn't contractual. If it doesn't work out, then you aren't out anything." I just look at her and think, "after 3 years, you have to say this?" Like she thinks it won't work out. They like C, so I don't get why she says this. Or tries to push houses on me after I have told her time and time again, "We are not ready for that yet. I am not ready for that yet. I can dream, but I know where I am at with finances and I don't feel comfortable taking that on on my own. Plus, he doesn't have a job just yet and we don't know where he will find one at." I literally just told her this tonight. I love her, but when she says things like this (and the above start of this paragraph), it bugs the crap out of me.
How did me talking about my Escape turn into this? Ugh, sorry. It was all on my mind. It will all be okay, I know. I'm going to bed, lots to do tomorrow to get my apartment ready for my man and his stuff! :D
Well, it's not really a year old, but I bought it a year ago today! I remember sitting in the salesman's office, signing papers, excited to finally have it. And it's been a great year. It has taken me out to Virginia to see C, to meet C in Gatlinburg, to work many times, and to top it- even my Grandmother likes it! I think, if she could drive more, she would be driving it.
So, anyways, I've put about 12,000 miles on it in the year that I've had it. I hit 10,000 just before our trip to Gatlinburg. I may be putting on 1,600 more by the end of the month, if I take it to go out and help C move back home.
I'm still in awe of the fact that in just 2 short weeks from tomorrow, we will be on our way home, to my apartment again. This time, we'll be sleeping in the same bed. I'm still in awe that the entire last year flew by. I do remember where I was a year ago, wondering when/if he'd be coming back.
I'm anxious for this, ready for it to happen. The closer we get, the more impatient I get. Although, the more nauseated and stressed I get. See, we have been looking into renting houses. As well as C finding a job. Neither are in our favor yet, and I'm making myself sick over it. I think the biggest thing I feel is that I don't want to let him down.
This is going to mean changes to our relationship. Not bad ones, but ones where we bot have to get used to being around each other more than a few days at a time. I'll have to get used to his snoring (he says I do, but NO! He does!), he'll have to get used to the fact that I rarely sleep without blankets (I like to be all bundled up), that I try not to waste things, etc. But all in all, we pretty much know how each other is, so it's not like this will be a huge shock.
I love my mom, but sometimes she'll say things like, "well, you know, this isn't contractual. If it doesn't work out, then you aren't out anything." I just look at her and think, "after 3 years, you have to say this?" Like she thinks it won't work out. They like C, so I don't get why she says this. Or tries to push houses on me after I have told her time and time again, "We are not ready for that yet. I am not ready for that yet. I can dream, but I know where I am at with finances and I don't feel comfortable taking that on on my own. Plus, he doesn't have a job just yet and we don't know where he will find one at." I literally just told her this tonight. I love her, but when she says things like this (and the above start of this paragraph), it bugs the crap out of me.
How did me talking about my Escape turn into this? Ugh, sorry. It was all on my mind. It will all be okay, I know. I'm going to bed, lots to do tomorrow to get my apartment ready for my man and his stuff! :D
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